


Midnight Dreams

by KristenRoth



Category: Original Work
Genre: Addiction, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Poetry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-02-12
Packaged: 2019-10-26 21:55:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17754191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KristenRoth/pseuds/KristenRoth
Summary: A series of poems





	1. Shadow of Dreams

Shadow of Dreams

I live in the shadow of my dreams  
Mind movies that ruin my truth  
They come when I wake  
No longer when I sleep

I am anything inside them  
I am nothing outside  
A shell of what I have done  
The shame of memories forgotten

The past invades too often  
Leaving the future dim   
I wish to have my dreams true  
They only smolder as ash 

The talents I let decay  
Decisions made and never unmade  
Pain invades my dreams  
A life missed wastes away

I shall be what I will  
A fool that misses nothing  
Invaluable to some  
Though the truth eludes them

I die in the shadow of my dreams


	2. Gone

Gone

In my world of darkness you were the sun  
The flame in your eyes was all I needed to see  
And that smile of yours made me be  
I knew then is was not anymore just childish fun

In the day that I met you,  
I started to melt slowly and to fall for you  
I knew you would always be here with me  
But with every second spent with you I realized that it was all a lie

Somewhere deep within  
Where my desires begun to fulfill  
The broken soul had begun to scream  
To scream for mercy, to make me stop dreaming

Countless days I thought you were still there  
And you were, but in my lovely dream  
The cruel lie and the sweet temptation  
Were then only one.

The line between pleasure and pain is thin  
We should feel them both  
'Cause they are soul-mates and you shall not even bother.  
If one dies, so does the other...


	3. Breathe

Breathe

I remember the first time I saw you  
So tall, so handsome  
You looked at me and then quickly looked away  
My breath caught

Breathe I told myself, breathe

Every time I saw you after that,  
My reaction was always the same.  
I had to remind myself to  
Breathe.

It never occurred to me to approach you,  
What would I have said to you?  
That you take my breath away?  
You didn’t even know who I was.

I was just one of many who admired you from afar,  
One of many who wanted to be yours  
One of many who had to remind themselves to  
Breathe.

I don’t remember what happened that made me brave.  
I was going to approach you, I was just going to say hello  
My heart pounded erratically as I looked for you in a room full of people.  
Then I saw you. Breathe I reminded myself.

I was halfway to you, and then I saw her.  
So beautiful. Hanging on to your arm.  
The diamond on her finger glittering in the light.  
My breath caught and my heart… It hurt.

Breathe.

Breathe.

Breathe.

That was many years ago  
And no one has ever made my breath catch as you did.  
Life happened, births, deaths, marriages and everything in between.  
I still had to remind myself to breathe but for different reasons.

Then one day, I looked up and there you were.  
My breath caught as it did all those years ago.  
I looked for her, the one that you married as I reminded myself to  
Breathe.

You are much older as am I; time has taken its toll  
You don’t stand as tall, your hair that was so dark  
Is now gray and thinning, your eyes are obscured by glasses  
But you are still him, the one who made my breath catch

This time when our eyes met, you didn’t look away  
When you walked toward me, my throat tightened  
What was I going to say to you?  
Breathe I reminded myself. Breathe.

So here we are months later after that first kiss  
That first touch. You are waiting for me to come toward you.  
As I walk toward you, everyone ceases to exist.  
Your eyes are on me and no one else.

As I reach you, I realize that from now until the day  
I no longer exist, from now until I am no more  
I will have to daily remind myself to  
Breathe.

That thought alone,makes my breath catch  
Breathe  
I tell myself as I walk toward you  
Just  
breathe


	4. Temporary

Temporary 

Today you're here, tomorrow you're gone.  
My love, my life is moving on.  
We both have things we have to do.  
Will I find you when they are through?

I was so lonely for so long,  
Then one night you came along.  
My sad heart sang a joyful song,  
Cause then I knew where I belong.

I'm facing months where we're apart,  
Alone but in each other's heart  
I pray to God I'll not lose you  
'cause life without you'd just be blue.

Today you're here, tomorrow you're gone.  
My love, my life is moving on,  
We both have things we have to do.  
Will I find you when they are through?

So get your life back, lose your past.  
I'll work things so I'm free at last.  
Until I see your smile again,  
I'll face each day with untold pain

Till you and I are we I'll hope,  
That with this emptiness I'll cope.  
My love for you's so deep and true,  
I won't be whole till I'm with you.

Alone tomorrow I'll miss you so,  
What people see from me's a show.  
To join you soon's for what I'll pray  
Cause I'm just living for that day.


	5. Lullaby

Lullaby

Lay your head upon my pillow,  
Rest your cheek against my breast:  
Come the night, the sweeping swallow  
Seeks the comfort of her nest.

Hush your words for words are hollow,  
Silence brings its own release:  
Though the winds may beat and bellow,  
By and by the storm must cease.

Close your eyes and dreams will follow,  
Sleep and I will soothe your brow:  
The sun will rise again tomorrow,  
But that is then, and this is now.


End file.
